Guess my lawnmower didn't get the memo before it blew up.

Yeah, the hearth debate is a classic. @grace_bailey, I bet you had the whole "historical charm" vs "wasted floor space" argument. My cousin spent months trying to explain why a non-working brick platform was a "room's anchor." Just put a plant on it, man. What did you end up doing with yours?

Yeah those kits are surprisingly decent for sealing up rim joists too, if you can get to them. The key is to go slow and do thin layers, otherwise it doesn't cure right and stays sticky. Made a huge difference in my old place, stopped that cold floor draft completely.